Laurence and Oliver knew only too well
Mum never sat them down in the front room
to hear good news.
'Boys,' she began nervously,
'I'd like you to meet Gerald.
Gerald and I are very much in love and...
well, you know how lonely I've been since
your father passed and I'd never think
to replace him, God rest his soul,
but, well,' she took off her spectacles,
'it would mean an awful lot to Gerald
if one day, the two of you
could come to call him father,'
and she glanced to her left, removing all doubt
that the toilet now plumbed into the corner
of the living room
was now her lover.
'YOU'RE NOT MY DAD!' Lawrence bawled
and ran from the room, leaving Olly,
sheepish as ever, to pick up the pieces.